Leave Your Ego At The Door

Whenever I pictured being a mom with my invisible children in tow, I pictured all of my tasks being applauded, and my children being so well-behaved every day. My invisible children appreciated every single task that I did for them; no task went unnoticed. This picture was amazing; a real self-fulfilling prophecy. My personality is one that involves a constant need for approval from others; imagine a large crowd following you around applauding every single time you do anything. (constantly working on, in therapy) What an absolute dream come true for me! Are you also wondering when my ego was going to be sucker punched by life?!

Then, one day, I became the mother of a real child, and before I knew it, I was the mother of a second real child. Look at that! My ego was suddenly sucker punched…by life. I have never had to pick my ego up from the floor as many times as I have in the last 5 years. My ego has been bruised and battered, and it hurts. It really hurts. Some days, my children are downright mean and for no other reason than because they are children and say whatever is on their mind. They truly don’t have a filter!

Motherhood/parenting is not for the faint of heart. It feels impossible to raise whole humans while also having to deal with your own baggage at the same exact time. Those whole humans will shine a light on all of your dirty laundry and will continue to do so until you clean it all up. What a cruel conundrum.

The ways that children show love and appreciation are oftentimes overlooked because, for most, it’s not what they’re used to and haven’t seen before. Children say I love you, I trust you, I appreciate you, I feel safe with you, and many other things, by hugging and kissing and following right behind us.

Buckle up because motherhood is a wild ride. I wouldn’t trade this ride for anything.