To Love Another

When I found out that I was pregnant with my first child in October 2018, I was so excited, nervous but excited. It was like something immediately switched in me, I fell in love with someone I had never met before. That love was instant and it hasn’t subsided since he was born in July 2019. I never thought that I could love anyone as much as I love my first child so the thought never crossed my mind. 

When I found out that I was pregnant with my second child in September 2021, I was so excited, nervous but excited. I was, of course nervous for a different reason this time around, not first time mom nerves but how will I love another human being as much I love my first child nerves. Mamas of multiples, I can imagine, often feel this way but wouldn’t dare say it because how could we ever think such a horrible thing?! But it’s true. I didn’t know until I became a mother, the intensity of such a love and I couldn’t even fathom how in the world I could ever replicate that love again. But you can, it is possible. When I saw those two lines, my love for my second child was instantaneous just like with my first child and it’s the same intensity. 

I, of course still had fears and anxieties about how I was going to split my time between two children but my fear of not loving my second child like my first child went out the window the day I found out I was pregnant with him. If you are a mama of multiples, your heart doesn’t divide, it only multiplies. It sounds cheesy but it’s the absolute truth!

My second little love arrived in June of this year (2022) and it’s like he was always what was missing, our family is now complete. I can’t imagine life without him in it, he was always meant to be ours. My love for both of my little loves is the most intense love that I have ever felt in my entire life and I can’t wait to watch them grow up together and become the best of friends.

The days are long and messy right now but it won’t always be like this. But I can’t imagine life any other way.